A Little Love

A little love moves mountains. My prayer is that more people would help. We ALL need hope and love. The simplest gift one can give! 🤶❤️🎄🦌

I want to tell you a story that seems more poignant during the holidays than most. I will do what I can to protect the identities of those involved, but will give as many details as I can to make sure you realize how really touching all this was. There’s a bit of backstory to it, which also makes the story even more touching.

There’s a man who I’ve known more than 30 years, who has spent a majority of our adult lives in and out of trouble and completely beholden to addiction. He is homeless and has lost everything, many times. He has minimal, if any, contact with his kids. I can’t tell you how many times, over the years, I’ve run into him out and about and talked him out of getting himself in trouble at the gas station; or bought him something to eat and drink. And yes, I’m aware plenty of people will disagree with this (But I’m not asking your opinion and don’t care if people like it or not), but I will buy him a pack of cigarettes if he’s really bad off–because sometimes a cigarette really is what stands between a struggling person and oblivion.

I have seen him dragged in cuffs and leg irons from the courthouse, fighting every step of the way. And I’ve seen him broke down in tears because he misses his kids and can’t see them. So to say I have “history and knowledge” of his situation, is an understatement. So in the last month, a few things have changed about his situation. He is clean and sober for the first time in YEARS. He is picking up spot work for people, and has gotten himself cleaned up and has had a stable, short-term place to stay. He’s gotten his fines lined out and is making payments on them. He’s got a rehab and work/vocational rehab center lined up that he left for yesterday, but is close enough to come into town and was here today a couple of times. He has very little, and what he does have, he has earned and it goes to pay on fines and to the court and to the bail company that took a chance on him. Mind you, this is a guy who, three weeks ago, was sitting in jail with no hope.

Today he popped in for a bit to get a jacket–as the weather turns colder, he needed to get one of the free ones we have, which we are happy to do. He also needed a lamp for his new place, so he found one here for $5–and literally, for the 15+ years I have been in business, he had never actually bought anything. He gets quite a bit of the stuff we give away (which we do, all the time, happily), but he was BEAMING with pride to take out cash, and pay for that lamp. He absolutely reminded me that it was “his first purchase, as a CUSTOMER, from me.” That’s a damn good thing to see.

He grabbed a sucker (he has switched to suckers and cut back dramatically on the cigarettes), and bounced out the door–on his way to make a payment of $20 to the fine center, as per his contract with them. He put on the new coat and headed out on his walk.

Shortly after, a regular customer who I had seen earlier post about a struggle he was having, popped in. It’s a terrible time of the year to struggle with pain, and I was fortunate to have a suggestion for his problem (I hadn’t posted about it to him, because I had completely forgotten). He was in for a bit, and we talked about that. He and some friends snagged a couple of items, just a few dollars worth. They didn’t have cash on them, but tried to use a card. Of course, due to the circumstances of what was going on today (as Murphy’s Law always seems to be in play here), the card declined. The dejected look on his face, I just felt bad. So, we set the stuff on the counter and told him we’d hold it for him for when he came back, which he said he wanted to do.

About ten seconds later, as we had gone back to work, we heard his voice say, “Hey did someone lose a $20 bill?” It was only a split second before we realized what had happened–when the other fella had switched coats, he dropped the $20 bill he had in a separate pocket, that was to go to the bail bondsman/fine center (I can’t remember which one it was).

Yes, this guy, who was already having a rough day, who had just had his card declined, picked up a $20 off the floor and without a second thought, turned it in. It would have been really easy, in his shoes, to just pocket it. Not saying he needed it or ever would have done that, but can you imagine the rock solid integrity a guy has to have, to be in that spot and immediately hand over the $20?

This series of events caused two things to immediately happen: The first was a bit of panic. Losing his last $20, money that was already earmarked to pay a bill he HAS to pay or go back to jail, can absolutely destroy an addict in their first few weeks of sobriety. Anything that upsets them or causes unnecessary stress, could send them right back to the arms of an addiction. So we tried calling him but he had no service on his phone, tried calling the bondsman and anyone we knew who might have an idea of where he was. The second thing it did, was me hand off the items that the second guy had tried to buy to Mike and he ran outside, thanked him for his integrity, and gave those items to him for free.

We were unable to get ahold of anyone who could get ahold of the first guy, but Mike tried everything. Yeah, we stopped our workday in the middle of the retail Christmas season, because we understood that this is something that, no matter how small it may seem to some, means a LOT to someone in his situation.

We were fortunate in that, just a few minutes later, he walked back in–also in panic. He thought he’d lost it at Casey’s, so he had been looking all over there and then freaked out and ran back over here. The sound of relief in his voice when we told him we had it, was palpable. Like, seeing that transition, we knew exactly what that meant to him–the whole world, in that moment. Mike told him the story of what happened, and the situation of the guy who found it.

I am not lying when i say he was flabbergasted. He had some change left over from his lamp purchase (that he’d used a $10 bill on), and immediately came over to my desk and said, “I’ll pay for his stuff out of what I have left.” I told him that it was unnecessary, because we gave it to him. He looked at me, quite seriously and said, “So you’re telling me that he got rewarded for being a person of integrity?” And he genuinely seemed shocked. To a person in a world of suffering, sometimes something as simple and as good as, “Good person has good thing happen to them,” seems so foreign as to be alien. I told him, a little catch in my voice, “yeah man, that’s the way the world should work.”

He then said, and I’m not making this up, “Well can I pay you for it then, so you’re not out the money?” We are talking about $3 and some change…to a guy that had less than $5 to his name (that didn’t belong to paying a bill). I told him it was unnecessary, and that I was, in fact, proud of both of those guys.

What I didn’t say, and wished I would have (and I’m betting at least one of them will read this, so I hope he understands I mean this from the bottom of my heart), I’ve been struggling to feel “Christmasy” this year. There’s a lot to balance with the store and the kids and the rental problems and the aches and pains of my time on this Earth. So many of my interactions this year have pushed simple joy out of me and replaced it with reactive bitterness, or a simple ignoring of situations and keeping to myself, when I would have stepped into them in the past. They reminded me to be less asshole and more thankful idiot. They returned my Christmas cheer, which I didn’t even think was possible.

Freakin’ A man, the world has a lot more good in it than I think we give it credit for. It just took two extremely unlikely people to remind me of that, and Mike and I were both blown away by the entire ordeal.

And I’m saying this with all sincerity: I’m overwhelmingly proud of those two men. To be a good person when the universe has beaten you back, is the most heroic thing you can do. ~RR